When Pregnancy Doesn’t Happen – Coping with Infertility

The journey to motherhood never seems to go according to plan. For some women who dream of becoming a mother, pregnancy just does not seem to happen on the expected time schedule. While it is common for it to take 6 months to one year to achieve pregnancy, for many women it can take much longer and it can be very discouraging.

Live your Life

Many couples put their lives on hold while they are trying to conceive. They may put off vacations, a change or career, or returning to school in the hopes that they would become pregnant and their plans would be interrupted. Trying to conceive can be an exciting time but it can also be extremely stressful, especially if it takes longer than expected. Stress can make it more difficult to become pregnant so it is important to continue doing things that you enjoy while you are trying to conceive, not only to distract yourself from the wait but for stress relief.

Find Support

Couples experiencing infertility may be reluctant to share their struggles with friends and family. Infertility can be an emotional and trying experience. It is important to have support, whether that is friends and family, or other couples experiencing infertility. Couples who are not comfortable discussing their ups and downs with people they see every day may be more comfortable finding support in an online group or through contact with a friend who lives further away.

Stop the Blame

It is tempting to find somewhere to place the blame whenever any problems come up in life. Avoid the temptation to blame yourself or your partner for infertility. If there is a medical reason that you have not been able to conceive, it is not something that either you or your partner had any control over and will only serve to tear you apart. Use the opportunity to come together in your struggles and strengthen your relationship. You will be all that more prepared when it comes time to make it through the first few sleep deprived months of your future baby’s life.

Don’t Hesitate to Ask for Help

As difficult as it may be to admit that there may be a problem and go to a doctor to ask for some help, it may be your best option. If you are lucky, your OB may be able to provide a simple answer for your infertility. Many times you may require additional testing and procedures to achieve a pregnancy. Communicate openly with your doctor and with your partner about what measures you are willing to take to become a mother.